I knew it before
by BecauseOfTwilight
Summary: hey. My name is Sarah. I love the Twilight saga, and I had to move to a new town. To the town of my dreams and my nightmares at the same time. to forks. I don't own Twilight
1. Chapter 1

mmm, hey. Its my first story in english so... hope it's good.

Chapter 1.

"Honey, are you ready?" my mum called from downstairs.

"Yeah, Mom, Just a minute," I said while I closed my bag in a hurry and dropped it on my back. I looked one more time at my room, it was empty now. I sighed.

I hated that I had to leave. Again, my father's boss sent him abroad for his job, and he has to stay there for several years. It's the forth time in my life that we're leaving the country. Untill we're finally getting used to the new place; we have to move to another one.

Until now, my father worked here, in Cuba. I really love this place; we have a big house, and the weather is great. More than that, people are really nice here.

Anyway, my parents didn't want to tell me where we are moving. They just said that it's in the north of the continent.

I sighed again and took my favorite book, _Twilight_. I wanted to read it again in the plane.

This book was... sort of a drug for me. I read it again and again, when I'm sad, or angry, or just bored. I enjoy reading this great love story. This book makes me believe in magical creatures. I wanted to meet a vampire. I wanted to find my Edward.

My mom's voice woke my up from my dreams.

"Is everything alright?" she asked.

"Ye-Yeah," I said and hurried to get downstairs.

"Come on, your father is already in the car," she said, pushing me to get out.

I got in the car and set in the back seat. Unfortunately, I have neither brothers nor sisters. I'm an only child, a fact which was really bad; now I'm sure to have no friends.

"Where are we going?" I asked for the millionth time.

My mom looked at my dad with worry.

"Honey," she said apologetically, "We haven't told you where we are moving because…" she paused again, hesitating. "Because we knew you wouldn't have agreed to come if you knew that... We...we're moving to Forks."

There was a long silent. I was shocked. I couldn't believe it. They knew what I thought about this town. They knew it was the town of my dreams and my nightmares at the same time. They knew it was the town of the vampires, and they knew how much I believed in these creatures.

They knew it.

"And you agreed to this?" I said in a low voice, looking at my father.

"We… We had no choice," my father apologized. "I need this job, Sarah, you know I do."

I said nothing. He was right; without this job, we have nowhere to go. This job is our only choice.

"I can't go there," I desperately said. "I hate this town. I just can't!"

"Honey, vampires do not exist!" my mom said, quite angry. "Stop it! You are grown-up enough to stop with these dreams! This is a really nice town, we talked to some of the people there, and you don't have to worry!"

"Who did you talk to?" I said.

"To Robert Swan," My father said, and I froze immediately. _Swan_?

"He's living there. He has a son, Charlie; he is 16, just like you."

That was too much. Charlie Swan? 16? No way.

"I...I don't understand..." I murmured, more to myself than to my parents.

My mom shot another worried glance at me.

"I promise you, honey, it will be alright."

I said nothing. I just nodded in silence.

I haven't said anything during the drive, and neither on the plane. My parents looked at me from time to time, but said nothing. "Maybe she's sick," I heard my mom whispering to my dad from the seat in front of me. "Maybe, I'll call Doctor Cullen when we'll arrive."

That was too much for me. _Cullen_? No, no way. I couldn't comprehend it.

"He really exists," I said to myself, shocked.

For the rest of the journey I read my book, thinking about those names, those persons that might exist. I stopped when I got to Edward's name. What about him? Does he exist? Do I want him to exist? I had no answers to these questions. I was sure Bella doesn't exist, because now her father is sixteen. I remember what the book said about him in his teen years; he was very beautiful, and very charming. Well, it won't work with me. He can keep his good manners to himself, I don't want them.

When we finally arrived to Forks, it was raining. What a surprise. My parents got a new car, and my father's boss found us a house in the little town. The car was a Volvo, a red one. During the whole journey I looked out the window, recognizing all the places, which were just a story, until now. We got to the house, and a car was parked next to it; a grey Citroen.

"Look honey, this is for you," my mom smiled at me. I looked at her, surprised.

They bought a car?! Wow, what a gift.

"Aww, Mom, Dad! Thank you!" I said happily. That was a very special gift, because I just got my driver's license.

When we got in the house, the furniture was already organized. I went up and got into my new room. He was bigger than the other one. I thought it wouldn't be a bad idea to buy some stuff to put here and there.

When I finished putting all my clothes in the closet, it was already dinner time.

"Sarah, come here, please," my mom called.

I got downstairs and froze. I regretted immediately for wearing my old jeans and T-shirt. Here he was, this gorgeous guy standing in front of me.

"Hey," he said in a low voice. "I'm Charlie."

I couldn't say anything. That was Charlie, Bella's father. He stood only two feet from me, and he was 16.

"I'm-I'm Sarah," I stammered, still not really believing what my eyes are seeing.

"We invited Charlie and his parents to have dinner with us," my father told me.

"What a great idea," I said, not really conscious to what he said.

We sat down for dinner, and, what a coincidence, Charlie sat in front of me, and smiled.

I haven't spoken a word during dinner. Our parents talked between themselves, and sometimes Charlie asked me things like what my favorite color is, and which music I preferred. When dinner was finally over, and Charlie's parents went to the living room with mine, I was about to go to my own room when I heard Charlie's voice behind me:

"Where are the toilets?"

"Upstairs," I told him, going up. "Right here," I said and showed him the door.

"Thanks," He smiled at me.

I hurried to go to my room and fell to my bed. It was unbelievable, impossible.

It was silent and peaceful here, so I decided to shut the lights off. I was tired, and I wanted to go sleep.

A few minutes later, someone knocked on my door.

I got up and said, "Come in!"

It was Charlie, and he came in shyly.

"You...you have a nice room," he said, smiling crookedly.

"Thanks," I said, smiling back.

The silence lingered, triggering some deep, mesmerizing tension between us. He slowly came closer to me, sitting next to me on the bed. He put one hand on my cheek, caressing it softly. His hand was just as silky as it looked.

"You are so beautiful..." He murmured in the dark, close to my ear. I could smell his breath, so warm, so close and delicious. Our faces slowly got closer, and I felt his hard, smooth lips on mine. His hand gently went up along my back, pulling me to his chest. Here I was, in my first day in Forks, kissing Charlie Swan in the darkness of my room.


	2. Chapter 2

I don't own any characters or Twilight,

Chapter 2

When I woke up the next morning, I was already stressed. I changed three times, leaving traces of shirts all over my room. Evantually I decided to wear a black mini skirt with long socks that went up to my knees and a grey, tight shirt.

"Wow," My mom smiled at me when she saw me in the kitchen.

I smiled back, blushing. "Thanks, Mom, You look good too." I said.She was in her work habites; she weared a white dress down to her knees, with a black badge with her name wrote on it withcapitals latters.

"Are you going to work already?" I asked.

"Yes, Dr, Cullen said me that it qould be great if I would start to work early as possible,"She said.

"I see," I said. My mum was a nurse. She wanted to be a doctor, but she didn't success her exams. But she really love her job.

I ate my breakfast and hurried to get to school. Charlie waited for me at school. When he saw me, his mouth fell open and his eyes popped wide.

"Hey, Charlie," I said in a sweet voice.

"Y-You're gorgeous!" He stuttered with an awed expression.

"Thank you, Charlie." I smiled, feeling my cheeks turning red again.

"Let's...Let's go to class," He said to me.

"Ok," I smiled.

We walked slowly to the classroom, and I heard everyone whispering around me:

"She's from Cuba..."

"You sure?"

"Look at her!"

"And with Swan, what a surprise!"

I looked for him. I knew he was here. I was sure; But I wasn't sure what or how to tell him that I knew.

We had English class, and I heard Charlie mumbling something like "...already sitting next to someone in English, I'm sorry."

"It's alright." I said.

We got in and I saw him. He was sitting there, in the middle of the class, next to a table, all by himself.

The descriptions in the book were nothing compared to his beauty; his bronze, smooth hair, shining in the sunlight. His white skin, snow-like, so soft and yet so strong. He was... beyond words.

I went right to the teacher's desk, being careful not to look at him. I haven't found a way to tell him yet.

"Hey," I said to the teacher, and he looked at me curiously.

"I'm Sarah Watson, I'm new here."

"Oh, you, yeah I heard a new student was coming... welcome," he smiled at me. "Have a sit; the class will begin in a few minutes."

I nodded and went to sit next to Edward.

"Can I?" I asked before I sat.

He looked at me and then around him; there were plenty of empty desks to sit in. he just stared at me again and then nodded indifferently, not saying a word.

"Thanks," I smiled at him. He didn't smile in return.

The class began and I took a deep breath. Well, I'd better start.

'Hi, Edward,' I thought, knowing he could hear me. He looked at me instantly, shocked. I grinned back sweetly.

'I know about your power; I know who you are, I know **what** you are.' I said in my thoughts.

"But...How?" he murmured quietly.

It was the first time I've heard him talking. His voice was like a melody to simple human ears with its grace and beauty. It took me a second to think coherently.

I've read about you.'

He sent me a puzzled look. I decided to stall him.

'I'll see you at lunch, we will talk there,' I thought, smiling a bit. He nodded once and then looked back at the teacher. I turned my head and smiled to Charlie, his expression twisted with jealousy.

At lunch time, when I got in the cafeteria, surrounded by all my new friends, I saw him. He sat in the farthest table, alone. The rest of his family was sitting not far from the door; with there untouched prop food, of course.

"Charlie," I said to him. "I have to talk with Edward Cullen about something, I'll be back in –, " I cut myself mid-sentence, watching his expression. "What happened?" I asked him, worried.

He was red now, glaring toward Edward.

"Charlie!" I said, putting my arms around his neck. "You're the one I love," I murmured in his ear, not caring of all the people who looked at us right now. He kissed me, and I returned. Then I smiled at him and went to Edward.

"Well, you're quick. Nice boyfriend." He said in a low, sarcastic voice

"Excuse me?" I said furiously. "Well, you're not as polite as I thought you were."

"You don't even know me. Who the hell do you think you are? What do you want from me?!" He said, and for a moment, he looked really scary.

"Here you are," I spat out angrily and gave him my book, Twilight.

He looked at it, confused.

"What the...?" he muttered.

"Read it for tomorrow. See you at lunch. And on the way, try to learn some good manners."

I went angrily to Charlie's table. He saw my annoyed expression. "What the hell happened to you?"

"Hmpf…Cullen doesn't know the meaning of politeness," I muttered, glaring at Edward. He was reading my book, not paying any attention to me.

"Oh, I see," Charlie said. It was obvious that Charlie was happy that I was angry with Edward, but he tried to look disappointed.

I haven't seen Edward during the rest of the day. He disappeared, and I tried not to think of him, and just do my best to be nice to my new friends. And, of course, spend some time with Charlie, since he was definitely not hiding his jealousy well.

"I still don't understand! Why was it so important for you to have lunch with this guy?" Charlie asked me again.

"Because," I explained to him for the hundredth time. "I wanted him to thank his father for me. I haven't felt well when we arrived, and he helped me to get better. That's it."

"Oh...," he said, suddenly smirking thoughtfully. "And, tell me," he asked, putting his hands on my back and pushing me closer to him. "How do you feel now?" he whispered in my ear seductively.

"Excellent," I smiled, and he kissed me.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3.

Edward didn't came the 3 next days after our conversation. I didn't know what to think; I didn't want him to go away; He couldn't go away, no now. I knew that if someone know about their secret, they have 2 choices: They can kill him, or go away. And I knew Carlisle would never kill somebody if he had the choice. I hoped that he will came back, I had to rassure him I won't tell it to anybody. I didn't say nothing to Charlie; It took me a lot of time to promise him that he was the only one. And that I didn't care about Edward. I asked my parents if they saw Dr. Cullen, and they said me they tolk to him yesterday, and that he asked about me. Suddenly, I felt hope. They are staying. They won't go anywere. I continued to look for him, but he didn't come.

A rainny day in october, when I came back home from Charlie's house, Edward was there. He sat in the living room, looking at the turn off television. He looked thoughfull. When I get in the house, he looked at me and get up.

"hey," I said, looking at him couriously.

"hey," He said, serious. "Sorry that I came without saying before, but I just had to talk to you, it's urgent."

"OK," I nodded.

"Thanks," He said, smiling a little. "Sorry about me behaviour the first day we met, I just... was confious." he said, embarassed.

"It's OK," I smiled at him, and he smiled me back. "Let's go in my room, we could talk there."

We get in the room in silence. I turn the lights on and show him the armchaire where he could sit. He smiled again and sat down.

"So... Did you like the book?" I said.

"Well... It's weird to read about yourself, especially when you fell in love there. And with a... a human," He whispered the last word. I looked at him, but he didn't look at me.

"Look... I know about your secret, but I won't say anything, I promise you... I can keep it-"

"It's not that," He said, looking at me. I felt my heart stopping beating while he look in my eyes, I knew he heard it, because he laught quietly. I blushed.

"That human girl... Charlie's daughter," He said, smiling to himself. "I don't want to prive her of her life, from her human experiences. All what you, Charlie, all of your friends will do, if I will fell in love with her, she would never do them. I could kill her, I don't want... I don't know if I could hold it and not kill her. I have to leave."

"No!" I begged, and he looked at me, suprised.

"I-I don't want you to go," I blushed, don't looking at him. "You don't understand... I read about you, I fell in love with you and knew that you don't existe. I... You are just..." I stopped, don't know how to continue. He looked at me, and I didn't realy knew what to say. I didn't looked at him, I didn't want to know what he looked like right now. I knew he thought I was crazy, that a girl he don't know came and say she fell in love with him.

"Please," I said after an embarassing silence. "Don't go."

I looked up, and his face was inches of mine. His breath, so different of Charlie's one, so cold, was so close to my mouth.

"I won't," He said quietly. "I'll stay here, for you."

He get up and went to the door.

"Edward...?" I said to him. and he turn back, expecting. "Can you say Alice I realy love her? She's so nice."

He laught and nodded.

"I'll say it to her," He laught and I smiled to him.

"See you tomorrow at school," He said and I nodded. He get out of my room, and I sat on my bad, thinking about the weird conversation I had a moment ago.

"Oh, crap," Charlie said and looked at the parking. I looked there to, and I saw Edward getting out of his silver car, and Alice of the passager door.

"Hey!" She said to me, and I smiled. He told her about me, and said her that I liked her.

"Alice," I smiled when she and her brother came to us. "nice to meet you, I'm Sarah,"

"I know," she smiled at me too. "It's nice to meet you."

"Good morning, Edward," I smiled at him. He smiled and nodded at me.

"Sarah... the class will begin, we had to go," Charlie said to me, and his voice was angry.

"Let's go, then," I said. "See you at lunch," I whispered to Edward and Alice. They smiled and disapeared.

"He came back," Charlie commented quietly, thoughtful.

"Yeah," I said. "We tolk yesterday. He apologized for his behavior and-"

"You talk yesterday?!" Charlie said, vexed.

"Yeah... He phoned home." I lied.

"Why you didn't called me?" He said.

"Because I didn't want to!" I was too angry to not shout. "You are not my mother, thank you very much! Get off me, you understand? I hate you when you're jealouse, it drive me crazy! Calm down, and we will talk later, allright?"

Before he could say anything, I get in the class and sat at the last banch, alone.

Charlie get in and sat next to Carla, one of our friend. He looked vexed, but I didn't care. He get me crazy when he's jealouse, I'm fed up with him.

Why can he understand that I don't want Edward, or at least that I'll never could get him. Edward was for Bella, and if I'll be with Charlie... Bella would never born, never existe.

"Can I sit here?" I heard a voice next to me that cut me out of my dreams.

The girl in front of me was beautiful; she had short brown hair, chocolat brown eyes, she had porminent cheekbones, a thin nose and too full lips. She had laugh lines, and she smiled politly.

"Yes, of corse," I said, smiling in my turn.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Renee, I'm new is school."

I froze. Renee? Well, this is the end of my love story. I knew the end of it now: Charlie will fall in love with her, they'll have a baby and then divorce. Sixteen years later their child will come back to Forks and fall in love with the beautiful Edward. And me? I'm out.

"Are you OK?" she asked me, worry.

"Ye-Yes, I'm fine," I mumbled. I was the opposite of fine. I was destroyed, break, I wanted to run away from this stupid class in this stupid school of that stupid town. I wanted to go back home, but this was my home now, I have nowhere to go.

"I'm Sarah," I said, trying to hid my feelings. Renee saw that I'm bad, but just smiled and look foward, at the teacher. I didn't arrive to concentrate on the lesson this hour, I just had to talk to Edward.

Of corse, he heard my thoughts, because he stand out of the door when I get out of the classe. Charlie looked at us but say nothing, just went to talk to Renee, and he was too kind and charmant, I think.

"Oh, I see." Edward said slowly, looking at Charlie and Renee laughing together.

"And what am I going to do now?" I sight.

"You have two choices: You can continue like nothing happened, have a good life with Charlie and prevent Bella's birth. Or, you can just leave the place to Renee, and you know the rest," He said without any emotion in his voice.

"That helps," I said, furiest.

He laught.

"Look, any choice you'll take will change everything. The fact that you are here changed a lot. You could let Charlie decide, juste to see what will happend," He said.

"That not a bad idea..." I whispered. Actually' this was my only choice; let Charlie decide.

He started to go to his next classe, and I went faster to not miss my classe.

"Oh, another thing,..." He said, and I turned to look at him, expecting. He didn't continue, and we just standed there, like idiotes. "Nothing..." He said finally, and he looked angry. I didn't say anything, just lookde at him. confused. "It's nothing, I wanted to-" The belle cuted him, and he sight. "It doesn't matter, we will talk later."

I tried to say something, but I didn't know what, so I just turned and run to my class, already late.


	4. Chapter 4

I don't own Twilight 3

Chapter 4.

"Sorry for being late..." I said and sat down quickly. Mrs. Hans nodded to me without interrupting her speech on one of her old poems. Charlie was sitting next to Renee, and they talked quietly. Charlie looked at me for a second and then looked back at Renee, who laughed quietly. As the bell rang I hurried to get out of the class, but all along the day I saw them together, going to their classes, chatting friendly. At the last hour before lunch, Charlie even took her hand and played with it. They always talked; they were so close to each other that they were almost sitting on the same chair. I felt my heart shatter to million tiny pieces, just like a vase someone dropped and broke each time they looked at each other. I saw something in their eyes. Something that Charlie never had with me, and would never have...

A tear rolled down on my cheek, yet I stayed quiet. When the bell rang I was the first out. I went to the girls' bathroom to clean up my make up, which was obviously smeared everywhere. I cleaned it up and calmed down. I breathed two big breathes and got out of the room, but what I saw out there wasn't very comforting.

Renee was standing against the wall, with Charlie kissing her with such a passion that he never had with me. His hands were on her waist, pulling her closer to him. Her hands were in his hair, holding his head tight to hers. Their lips moved together, their eyes were closed. It felt like a nightmare, but worse. I felt myself walking back, without knowing where I went. I couldn't pull my eyes off of them, I couldn't believe he did this to me. I had to look clearly; to be sure it's him, even if I didn't want it to be him.

But it was Charlie, holding Renee in his arms. I couldn't say anything, my mouth refused to move, but my legs moved against my wish. I finally managed to look away and turn back to get in one of the empty classes.

It was lunch time, so no one would know I was here; no one would care to know where I was... Not even Edward.

I ran into the first empty class and locked the door. It was the biology class, and I saw books scattered here and there. I ran to the farthest bench and hid under it. I haven't stopped crying; I just couldn't.

'You stupid!' I said to myself. 'What did you expect? That Charlie won't fall in love because of you? You were just a game, a girl who just made him look good! You have nothing to do here! No one would care about you! Nobody wants you! Not Charlie and obviously not Edward! Stop dreaming! It would never-'

"Sarah!" I heard Charlie's voice out there; he knocked on the door, trying to open it. "I can explain everything! Just let me in and I -"

"Go away!" I shouted to him, hardly breathing because of the tears. "I knew it would happen. I knew it! I just hoped it wouldn't have..." I couldn't continue because of the tears that got down on my cheeks and strangled me. I tried to calm down while Charlie almost broke the door by trying to open it.

"Just go," I begged. "I know you love her... More than everything... Even more than you ever loved me..." My voice broke, and I put my head between me knees.

There was silence for a minute, and I thought Charlie finally left me alone, but then, someone knocked at the door again.

"Charlie, I'm begging you, leave me -"

"It's me," I recognized Edward's voice.

I didn't answer him immediately. What am I suppose to do? Should I open? What if Charlie is still out there? More than that, I surely look awful.

"I'm alone," He said, answering my thoughts. "And I'm sure I can handle it. Please, open the door."

I got up and moved slowly to the door. I trembled all over my body while I went through the empty class; the tears kept streaming from my eyes.

I felt weak, broken and empty.

I unlocked the door and opened it slowly. He looked at me, for a very long time, his face looked like there was pain in it, pain from seeing me like this.

And suddenly, I don't know how it happened; I just jumped into his arms, crying into his neck. I was surprised just as he was, and for the first time, I actually touched him; His body, cold and hard like rock, was frozen in shock now.

He didn't move, afraid to lose control. I cried into his neck, too unconscious to understand what just happened. Slowly, very slowly, he moved his white and cold hand to my hair, caressing it. I knew what he was doing now was very difficult for him, to touch a human. So close, have to take such a big control over himself. Slowly, I composed myself and took a step back. He let me go slowly, like he didn't want me to go.

"Sorry," I mumbled, looking at the floor. "I didn't want to do it, I Just... I -"

"It's OK," he calmed me, putting his cool and hard hand on my cheek, cleaning all the tears.

We didn't say anything, just stood there, with his hand on my cheek.

"We should get in... We have to talk." He whispered.

I nodded, and he pulled his hand back and got in the class. I was already in, so I closed the door when he got in. He sat down on the closest chair and I sat on the one in front of him, but not too close. I didn't look at him; I was too embarrassed because of what just happened.

"It's ok," he repeated as he heard my thoughts. "I'm ok; you're in pain right now, not me."

"I'm really sorry," I began. The words just got out of my mouth without control; I felt I had to explain what I did. "I know I shouldn't, but... I just couldn't control myself, I needed it and you were there, and I know it was very difficult for you, I don't know what was I thinking - "

"Sarah!" he cut me. "I said it was fine."

There was a big silence in which I refused to look up at him, even if I really wanted to.

"I'm sorry," He suddenly said.

I looked at him, confused. What could he be sorry for?

"I should have asked Alice to look for him... I was sure she would come one day, I just didn't expect it would be so soon..."

"You don't have to apologize," I whispered. "I was dumb. I knew it would happen, it had to happen. This is your future, and if I would prevent Charlie and Renee from being together, you would never be with Bella, and you have to, this is your story." It hurt me to say it, but I had to. I couldn't do anything about it.

Charlie is with Renee and their daughter would be with Edward, end of the story.

"Sarah and what if… what if I don't want that future? What if I want to be with the girl I love now?" Edward mumbled.

That was a bad sign, Edward has never mumbled.

"Another girl? But...I thought no one has ever…caught your eye," I said quietly.

"Well... I see you know much about me that I thought..." He said, but didn't answer my question. He just got up and approached me. He sat on the chair next to me and put his hands on my cheeks. I froze, but like the last time, I felt my heart stop beating. He laughed quietly and I blushed without moving.

I approached him slowly, hesitating. My eyes were fixed on his, hypnotized. He was inches from my lips. I felt his cold breath and I trembled a little. He felt it, but didn't stop.

Finally, his hard and cold lips touched mine. It was very hard to resist, or refuse, even if I knew I should have.

I didn't act like Bella; I stayed froze, letting him do everything. We stayed like that for a moment, but when he pulled me away, I felt it was too quick. I stayed with my eyes closed, still frozen, even when he wasn't kissing me.

"Are you OK?" He asked after a moment, worried.

"I don't want to wake up..." I whispered. This was a very dumb answer, but it was true; I was sure I'm dreaming, and I didn't want this dream to break up.

He laughed.

"You can open your eyes, it's not a dream, and it was real. I kissed you, and I think I love you."


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

"You do?" I asked quietly. That was one of my wild dream, to hear Edward saying he loved me, but it was before I knew he existed; And a little after. He laughed and I blushed.

"Why me?" I asked him quietly. "I thought no one never catched you eye..."

"It's true, no one never did, before you came to Forks." He said, putting his hand on my cheek.

"Look, I love you because you have something special. Maybe I can read you minde, unlike Bella's, but you were ready to let me be with her, you let Charlie be with Renee, you let them be together, just for me. You heart yourself just because you wanted me to be happy, and I'm sure Bella wouldn't do that."

There was a silent, in wich I looked up at him; his perfect face, his white and cold skin, his golden eyes, his smooth hair... He was too perfect.

"Thank you," He answer my thoughts. I smiled and get close to him. My torse touched his, my arms rolled around his neck, and my face touched his. I let my cheek on his, smelling his sweet smell. I closed my eyes, letting my hand going up on his thorat, into his hair. I felt his hands caressing lightly my back, his face in my hair, breathing big breaths. We stayed like that, just touching each other, enjoying this moment. The bell rang, but I didn't move. I didn't want to let go, I was sure it wasn't real, but I didn't want it to stop.

"We had to go," Edward whispered in my hear.

"But I don't want to," I whispered in my turn.

"The teacher will come in few minutes, I promise you I will be there when you'll get out of your class," He promised me, pulling me up lightly.

We got up and he kissed me quickly.

"It would be a long hour..." I sight.

"I'll think about you, and it would pass," He smiled at me.

I smiled on my turn and we got out of the class. He walked with me to my next classe, his hand on my back.

He arrived to the class' door, and I turned to face him.

"You will be here, aren't you?" I asked, worried.

"I will," He promised, whispering in my hear. He hugged me, and I rolled my arms around his neck, breathing his smell one more time before getting in the classe. When I turned back again, he was already gone.

Luckly, neither Charlie or Renee had class with me that hour, so I sat next to Alex, who's actually Jessica's mother. Thought she was very different from her futur child; She didn't talk a lot, just asked if I was Ok [I think it's because of my make up; I had to look awful], and said she was sorry about Charlie.

The class started, but I couldn't concentrate on it. Actually, I didn't even try to; I just thought about Edward, that it was so wired, to be with the man I read about, to be with the man I really knew and loved. Like Edward said, the hour passed very quickly; As the bell rang I huuried to go out of the class, and, just like he promised, he was there, pulled against the wall, and, when he saw me, he smiled at me his croocked smile, and I thought I'm going to melt; He laughed.

"Are you ready to go?" He asked, putting his arm around my shoulders.

"Yeah, let's go." I said.

"We will go with your car, I gave my keys to Alice, and they will go home with mine." He said.

"Ok, but, just one thing..." I said, looking up at him.

"No way, I'm driving!" He said before I could finishing my phrase.

"But if Bella was right, I just won't hadle your drive's manners!" I begged.

"I won't drive fast, if it's so annoying you."

"Thank you, love," I said in a sweet voice; He rolled his eyes and I laughed.

We got in the car, and I sat on the passager seat. He sat next to me and streched out his hand.

"The keys, please," He said, smiling at me his cooked smile.

"Here you are," I droped them in his hand, hypnotized.

He started the car and got out of the school parking.

"so," he began; I looked at his perfect face, waiting for him to continue. "You know so much about me, and know it's my turn."

"Mmm... Are you sure? You will get very bored," I warned him.

"I think I can handle it," He smiled.

"OK, ask anything you want to know," I said.

And it began: He asked me about the countries I've been in, my favorite color, flower, my type of gay, the guys I've been with [actually, ther was only one, 2 years ago, and a week after we had to move to another country], well, just like he did [or not] with Bella in the book. We arrived home, but he didn't stop to talk, we just sat there. He asked me what I liked in the book, what part I prefered, and what I liked about him; It was hard to answer him, because he was too perfect, I love everything about him. My mum was home, and an hour after we came, I felt my phone trambling; My mum called because I wasn't at home already; She didn't hear the car parking.

"I'm with a friend," I said to her. "I'll be home in a while."

"Well, next time, say me you're going, it drove me crazy!" She said, angry.

"Ok, mum, sorry mum," I said and turn down the phone.

"You should go," Edward said.

"I don't want to," I said; It was true, I loved his questions; Well, I actually love to be in his company. He laugh.

"Me too, I love being with you," he said, caressing my cheek with his cold hand.

"Can you come tonight? I mean, in my room?" I asked.

"Yeah, I will," he promised. He kissed me, his cold lips were one mine, moving lightly. After a moment, he pulled up and got out of the car.

"See you tonight," I said, getting out of the car as well. He nodded to me, and diseppear.

I got in the house, it was already seven, and my mum was in the kitchen, finishing to cook.

"Hey mum," I said.

"Hey,"

"Mmm... It smells good," I said.

"Thanks honey,"She said. "You should have a shower before eating, and then you should go sleep early tonight, you look tired."

"I am tired," I whispered.

I got up and had a long shower. I stayed a long moment in the hot water, my eyes closed, and I just thought about the long day I had.

I got out of the shower when my mum called me to come for dinner. I put quickly my old pyjama and got down to the kitchen. My parents were already sitting and waiting for me.

"Sorry," I apologized. "It looks good, mum."

I hurried to eat and got up quickly, with the excuse I hadn't done my homeworks. When I got in the room, he was already ther, sitting on my bed, like a god who came from nowhere.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapiter 6

"You came..." I whispered. I looked at his perfect face, hypnotized. I didn't belive he would come; I was sure all what happend today was only a dream, a hope.

"Of corse I came," he got up and approched me; his hand rolled around my shoulders and his mouth was inches of mines.

"I promised you I would, didn't I?" He whisered.

"You did," I agreed without thinking, it wasn't realy like I actually could think when he was so close to me. His lips finally touched mine, and this time, I didn't froze; My hands went directly to his hair, pulling him closer; He stepped back, moving to the bed. I walked with him, my chest against his, his hands on my waist, cool and light. He pulled me on the bed, and then laid next to me, still kissing. Slowly, one of his hands dragged to my legs, until my left knee. He drawed it up and put it on his waist, cressing my leg. My heart stopped beating, I didn't belived what just happend, I didn't belive that Edward would -

"Sarah!" My mum called from the living room. We froze, and slowly, very slowly, he let me go, leaving my leg and putting it back. "Sarah!" My mum called again.

"I'm coming!" I said. God, what does she want again? And why now?

"What?" I asked her when I arrived downstairs.

"It's Charlie," She said, giving me the phone. I hesitated; Should I talk to him? Should I hear what he has to say?

Slowly, I took the phone and put it next to my hear.

"What?" I asked him, going away from the living room and sat on the stairs.

"Sarah..." He said my name quietly. "I just wanted to apologize... I - I'm really sorry, but... I mean - "

"Charlie," I whispered. "It's OK. I'm not angry, realy. I know you love her, realy love her, and between us... Well, it would never really works."

"You - You're not... Angry?" He asked, suprise.

"No," I lied. "Now, please, I had to go. I'll see you on... Bye Charlie." I said, and before he could reply, I hang the phone ang got back to my room. Edward was sitting on my bed, his head in his hands.

"What's wrong?" I whispered, sitting next to him and caressing his back lightly.

"I'm sorry..." He began. "I shouldn't... I don't know what I thought... I could kill you... I still can kill you... I'm sorry, sarah..." He stood up and went to the window.

"Edward..." I said, sitting on my bed. He turned to look at me. "Do you think I did all this for nothing? I don't care if you can kill me, because I know you won't. You aren't killing Bella in the end, and I know you won't kill me."

I stood up and hugged him.

"I love you, Edward, and I know my scent is not as hard to support for you, I know you can handle it... If you want to."

"Of corse I want!" He said, looking at me. "You're the most precious person to me, I love you so much... I'm just afraid..."

"So don't be," I whispered, tracing his lips with my index.

He closed his eyes, but said nothing. I hid my face in his neck, breathing lightly.

Suddenly, his armes rolled around me, and he sight.

"I'm sorry..." He said again. "I didn't want to vex you, I just... I'm afraid."

There was a silent, and I almost fall asleep in his arms. He took me in his arms and brought me to the bed and covered me. Then, he laid next to me, his head pulled on his hand, and played with my hair.

"You know what?" I asked him, even if I knew he read it in my thoughts.

"What?" He still asked me.

"You can know what I'm dreaming about... And I'm sure you'd like it..." I smiled.

I heard him saying something about that he love anything about me, but it was possible I was already dreaming.

The cold hands who caressed me lightly woke me up in the morning. I didn't open my eyes, I stayed there, enjoying his touch. After a while, I felt his breath next to my hear and he said:

"You're not sleeping a lot."

I opened my eyes and I saw him smiling.

"Well, why should I sleep when I'm living in a dream?" I asked him, smiling back. I suddenly felt bad; Usually, I don't speak in the morning before brushing my teeth, and that what maked me fell that bad.

"Go then, I'll wait," he whispered in my hear, and let me go. I hurried to the bathroom, and brushed my teeth in a rush, I wanted to back to him as quick as possible.

When I showed up again in the room, he was standing next to my desk, and I reconized my songs' notebook in his hand.

"That was quick," He turn back and smiled to me.

"Did you read that?" I asked, worried. I didn't want him to read it, it was too much.

"I was just about to... Why don't you want me to read your songs?" He asked, quite confused.

" 'Cause... i mean, I'm not good at it and... It's quite a secret."

"I can keep secrets," he said, vexed.

"I know... It's just... No one ever read it and... I just don't want anybody to."

"So... If you don't want me to read it... Can you play me one of your songs?" He said, smiling me his crooked smile and pointed my guitare in the corner of the room.

"Edward!" I sight.

Actually, I wasn't really a bad singer, but... I had no attention to ridiculous myself.

"I'm sure you're singing well," he encoraged me. "Please... there's no one here but us, I want to hear you singing..." He smiled me his crooked smile, and I couldn't say no.

"You'll pay it," I mumbled. I took my guitare and began to play:

It could be stupid

But I belive in it

My end isn't happy

But my story is

My end is mostly here

But I don't wanna say goodbye

'Cause I'm not ready to go

No, not alone

Not alone

They want my death

I want you to be safe

They want my blood

Don't risk your life

Don't try to avenge

'Cause I don't want vengence

I want you to be happy

To find your soul mate

I'm just a human girl

Don't risk yourself for me

Find a real love

And forget me

They want my death

I want you to be safe

They want my blood

Don't risk you life

Look at me

One more time

You'll fell my heart

Next to you

Look at me

I wanna see your eyes

I wanna fell your mouth

One more time

They want my death

I want you to be safe

They want my blood

Don't risk your life

They are coming

But I won't fight

Please, just leave me

Start your new life

There was a silent, and they I said:

"I wrote it about the letter Bella wrote to you before James..." I didn't finish my phrase.

"It... It's beautiful." He whispered.

"Thank you." I said.

He nodded and then got up from my bed.

"I have to go now," he said.

"you'll come back. do you?" I asked.

"I do," he said and got out from the window. For a long moment, I just stayed there, looking down the window, thinking about what I sang, thinking about us.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7.

It was Saturday, and I was dead boring since Edward was gone. I tried to do something to get him out of my mind, but I couldn't. I didn't know what he was thinking when I played the song, but i knew it wasn't good. I went up to take my guitar and my songs' notebook and get back to the living room. I was just sitting there, trying to write another song, and, for the first time of my life, I didn't find the words I needed to expire myself. I thought about the song I played him, called 'Forget me'. Did he take it seriously? I really hoped he didn't. 'I don't wanna say goodbye', did he took that seriously? He can't go now, because now I'm too concerned to let him go, and I won't let him. I took my guitar again, replying this stupid song again and again, who was, in some way, our song. The phone rang after a while who seems like minutes and actually was a few hours. It was Charlie.

"Sarah?" he asked.

"No," I said. "It's her sister."

"Her sister?" he asked. Confused. "But Sarah has no sister!"

"It's me, you dumb!" I sight, desperate.

"Oh..." he said.

"Charlie, what can i do for you?'Cause there some other guys who needs my help," I laugh, but he didn't understand it that way.

"Oh... So he's there."

"No... Charlie, it was a joke."

"Oh."

I waited for him to say what he wanted, but he didn't seem to realize that.

"Charlie? Is everything all right?" I asked him.

"Sarah... Can I - can I come over? Right now?" he asked.

"Yeah, of cores... But, Charlie, what happened? Charlie? Charlie!" he didn't answer me because he had already hanged down the phone. I was too worried to go back to my guitar, who was drop in the living room, where I was walking around and waited for Charlie to come.

After a while who looked like hours, he finally came in without even knocking.

"Charlie!" I ran to him immediately; he looked desperate.

He looked at me for a long moment; His eyes were red, obviously, he cried a lot. His hair was dirty and his cheeks dark pink.

"What happened to you?" I whispered, looking at his red face. And then, suddenly, he jumped into my arms, crying.

I was surprised, but let it be, it looked like it needed it. To have him in my arms remembered me my first months in Forks. I really missed them, and without even notice, I missed Charlie.

"I'm sorry," he said after a while. "I'm sorry... I couldn't tell anybody... You're the only one I fell I can tell it... I'm sorry..." He mumbled his voice strangely quiet.

Tell me, please..." I said him, my hand caressing his back.

He didn't say anything though; he stayed hugging me, relaxing. And then, he jumped and get off me.

"I shouldn't be here..." He mumbled, going to the door.

"Charlie!" I said, not understanding.

"I'm sorry, Sarah... i shouldn't come..." He got out the door, going to his car.

"Charlie!" I yelled again, running after him. But by the time I went out the house he was already in his car, ready to go.

"Come back..." I mumbled, begging, but he was already gone.

I get back in the house, desperate. I drop myself on the couch, next to my guitar. I felt guilt, and sadness, as if Charlie's pain was mine as well.' Why should you feel bad about him?' I thought angrily. 'He hurt you, and then he come cry? Why should you care about him? He shouldn't even call! And-'

"Why are you angry?" a voice made me jump. I turned back and saw Alice sitting on the armchair next to the couch.

"You scared me!" I breathe. "What are you doing here, anyway?"

"I came to say hello," she dodged without looking at me.

"Yeah right, Alice. I'm not dumb, you know..." I said, looking at her with guilt.

"All right!" I saw you fell badly because of Charlie, and I know why." She said.

"And...?" I asked her, trying to stay calm.

"Well... It was about Renee... She-She's pregnant..." She said after a long silent.

I froze. Of course! That why was he so destroyed, why didn't he tell me, and why he came to me! And what should I do now? I immediately thought about Edward.

"Is that all?" I whispered.

"Well... Not actually. And that why I came now, when Edward is gone." She sight.

"Say it," I said hardly. I knew already what she saw, but I wanted to be sure.

"Well... Even if Edward is sure he wouldn't fall in love with Bella... Well, he would, I saw it."

That was why he was so silent this morning, that why he was gone after I sang, and that's what I always said, that Bella is the one, that's what he always ignored...

"When did you see it?" I asked.

"This morning," She whispered. She refused to look at me, even if I tried to look in her eyes while she talked. "And he saw it when he came in the morning to change his cloths."

"Where is he?" I finally asked. That it, Bella is coming, and I have to go.

"He went to Denali," She said, this time looking at me. "He promised he would come back, but he didn't say when..."

"Alice, what am I suppose to do?" I cried. That's it, the tears were coming.

"I don't know..." She sat next to me, hugging me tightly. Her cold skin, hard and white like his, made me cry even more.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapitre 8

Alice stayed with me for a while, and then went back home. I didn't do nothing during the rest of the day. I just stayed in my room, not going out, not letting anyone in.

My mum came from time to time to see what I have, but I didn't let her in. I didn't want to explain to her everything; usually I tell everything to my mum, but not this time.

I fell asleep after what seems like hours. All the questions, the conculsions, and what would happen know, scared me.

When I woke up again, something cold and familiar was next to me.

"Good morning," Edward's voice said. I was sure I was dreaming, I couldn't believe he was there, not after what happened yesterday.

"I came back," He said, and I opened my eyes. I don't know how, but he looked sad, desesparate. "We have to talk."

"Yes, we should." I agreed.

"Look... I eared that Alice was here and she... told you the news." He didn't look at me.

"Yes, she was here." I repeated what he said. "And she told me what she saw yesterday."

"I know." He said immediatly, angry.

"You shouldn't be angry," I whispered, escpacing his eyes. "I knew it would happen, and you knew it, too."

There was an embarrassing silent, who prouved me I was right.

"Sarah, I love you," He said finally.

"Yes, for now; but when Bella would come... You wouldn't." I mumbled, still without looking at him.

"It's not true,"he spited out angrily.

"Isn't it?" I asked, looking into his topaz eyes. He didn't reply.

"Edward, I understand, really," I said after a moment, putting my hand on his cold and pale cheek.

"I can't do it," he said. "I can't let you go, it stronger than me." he sight, closing his eyes.

I said nothing, just put my forhead on his shoulder and closed my eyes. I couldn't let him go, either.

I was so deep in my thoughts that my phone's ringing made me jump. Edward took the phone and responded.

"Yeah?" He said. Ther was a silent for a few secondes and then he said:

"Alright," and hang me the phone.

I looked at him curiously, but he said nothing. I took the phone and said:

"Yeah?"

"Sarah?" Charlie's voice, as streesed and disrupted as yesterday.

"Yes, Charlie?" I asked him, by this time, Edward was coated next to me already.

"Listen, I have to tell you something," he said.

"I'm listenning," I said, but I already knew what he had to say.

"It's not to the phone," He whispered. "Can I come?"

"Of course," I said, not asking any questions.

"But... I don't want him to ear it," He said.

"It's OK, he's about to go, anyway," I said, looking at Edward, who nodded and got up. but I caught his shirt and said without any voice:

"Not now!"

He smiled and sat on the bed next to me.

"Ok," Charlie said. "i'm on my way."

"see ya." I sais and hang down.

"Well, he would tell you the truth now," Edward commented.

"Yep," I said, getting up from the bed and went to my wordrobe, looking for something to wear. I took a black T-shirt and a grey mini skirt.

"I like it," Edward said when I showed it to him.

"Great, I'm right back," I siad and went to the bathroom to change.

A seconde after I put my skirt he get in the room, rolling his arms around my waist and breath my hair.

"Perfect," He whispered.

"Perfect?" I asked. What happend to him?

"Sure," He said. "I would like to know what Charlie would think about that."

"Mmm... You're jealous, arn't you?" I asked.

"Me?" he said innocently.

I laugh.

"I'll be out the window, so stay in your room," he said, opening the door for me.

"Yes, sir." I said in a military voice and get out the room.

We get down the stairs to the living room; The house was empty: My parents were already at work.

We didn't do anything special, he just played with my hair, and I drow with my finger on his arm.

"He's here," Edward finally said, looking at the door.

"Allright," I said and got up from the couch. He did the same and a second later desapeared in the stairs.

I went to the door and opened it: Charlie was getting out of his car, I don't know anything about cars, but it was a grey one.

"Hey," He said while he went out of his car. He didn't sound better than yesterday.

"Hey," I said, trying to smile at him.

I get back in the house and he did the same. Then I pointed up and said:

"Shall we go to my room?"

"Allright," he said and went first.

We got in the room and I sat on my bed; He stayed up.

"So... What did you want to tell me?


	9. Chapter 9

chapter 9

"I... well, don't juge me, please... I didn't wanted it to happend... it just happend and - "

"Charlie!" I yelled. "Don't freak me out!"

"Renee is pregnant." he said and turn back, escaping my eyes.

Well, nothing new, but I had to play like I was suprise, like I couldn't believe.

"Wow," I said and sat on the bed. "That's hudge."

"Hudge?" He freaked out. "Sarah, I'm going to have a child! I'm going to be... Dad!" He seemed terrefied by the only thought of the thing.

"Well, you have to take your responsabilities," I said, What else could I say?

"You... you don't understand..." He sigh.

"Yes I do. But what do you want me to say, Charlie? 'Oh my god, lets get out of here and leave Renee with her baby'? Or should I say: 'What's the problem, Charlie? Just apologize and say her you don't want that baby'? Right, Charlie, that would be very mature."

I finally breath, and there was a long and electric silent. I was angry, without even knowing why.

"I-" He started, but I just had to let it out:

"You what, Charlie? Why did you even told me about it? What am I suppose to do? To be Renee's best friend? Or help her as much as I can? Why should I do this, Charlie? She destroyed everything."

Of course he thought I was talking about he and me, but I was talking about my futur, and about their futur child.

He was stupefied, and froze in front of me. I breathed heavinessly, but I felt better, though.

"You're right," he whispered after a long minute. He turned back and got out the room. I didn't go after him; I didn't want to. I felt no regret about my words, I believed in all what I've told him.

I heard his car leaving my house's parking and a second later, Edward was next to me.

"That was hard," he said, sitting on the bad behind me.

"But it was true," I said.

"He didn't understood it the way you did," Edward said quietly after a moment.

"I know." I said. "But it true in both ways."

He didn't responded. I wanted to see what were his face like, what emotion he felt, but I didn't turn back.

"I'm sorry," he whispered in my hear, answering my thoughts and rolling his arms around my waist, pulling me close to him.

"But it would not change anything," I said, trying to hold on my tears a few more moments, without any success. "She would be born, and you would fall in love with her, and I would be heartbroken, as always." I wanted him to let me go, but I know that if I would try to go, he wouldn't let me, and I would break something, so I let him be.

"I won't fall in love!" He was angry, as I was, but I didn't care. And, oviviously, he didn't pay much attention to my thoughts, because he didn't let go. I wanted to say everything I thought, even if he already knew it, I didn't care; He would hear it one more time.

"You can say it as much as you want to," I said quietly, looking in his eyes, with tears in mine. "It wouldn't change the fact you would, and you know you would. I know you would. and Alice saw you would be together. So don't even try to make me believe it wouldn't happen, because it would hurt me even more."

I was perfectly calm, even if my tears were still there, falling on my cheeks, wetting my face. I wasn't scared to look in his golden eyes, I didn't care if his anger would turn wrong, because I knew there was nothing left me to live for.

"Please, let me go," I said after a minute of silent, in wich he looked in my eyes, with sadness in both of ours. I said it generally. I wanted him to let me go, to leave me alone, because I knew each seconde with him would make it harder later. But he understood it the wrong way, like Charlie.

"No," he said, and I felt his arms holding me tighter until it began to hurt. "I can't."

"You can, but you don't want to," I said.

"Right, I don't. I don't want to let you go." His voice was hard, like as he tried to convice himself it's true.

"Me neither, but I have to." I tried to move, but it just hurt me more. His arms held me tighter, and it hurt me, and he knew it. I looked in his eyes: He was angry, but scared as well. He loosed control. I knew it. He would never hurt me, not when he's under control.

"Edward, it hurts," I whispered. I couldn't breath, his arms were cold around my waist, and his cold and hard chest was hardly pulled to mine. Too hard.

"Edward!" I said. "I can't breath!"

"I won't let you go..." He said in a freaky voice. I looked into his eyes: they were unfocused, and he was... trambling, of rage or fear, I couldn't say, but slowly, my view became fuzzy, and I felt nauseated. I tried hoplessly to breath, but I didn't success, I reapeted Edward's name again and again, hoping he would hear me and let me go, but he just continued to say:

"I won't let you go..."

I tried to move, to hurt him in anyway. I tried to hit him, to pinch him. I yelled his name, begging him to let me go, to leave me, but he didn't move. I fell in his arms, i couldn't stay on my feet, but he held me the same way, without even notincing I fell.

The last thing I felt was his pressure getting harder. The last thing I tasted was the tast of my blood in my mouth. The last word I said was Edward's name.


End file.
